Before I go into this article, I just wanted to say this is my experience how I remember it. I am not encouraging anyone to do anything similar and much of what I say will go in the face of what is believed by modern society to be scientifically valid. This is just my account of how things unfolded, please take it or leave it.
I can’t remember exactly how the idea of drinking ayahuasca happened, but I do remember it escalated very quickly. After 2 years of crazy synchronicities and a series of dreams and visions in which I communicated with the vine, I was sat in the Peruvian jungle ready to drink.
A brief back story of how this happened: In 2014 I learned of Ayahuasca and started to look into its use. I watched a few documentaries and started to read as much information as I could get my hands on. One of the documentaries I watched was from Rebekah a local shaman (to me in the UK) called The Shaman’s Last Apprentice. Something in this film spoke to me, but I quickly forgot about it and life went on as usual.
It must have been 6 months or so later that I was reading a book called Plant Spirit Medicine. In this book it said about communicating with plant spirits. For me this was less about ayahuasca, and more about communicating with local plants to get an understanding of what would be good for local healing.
I plugged in my headphones to listen to some Shamanic drumming and little did I know my mind would be blown to pieces by what I experienced. I had visions of indigenous tribes, local plants and purged (vomited) after the experience (something totally new to me at the time). The vomit was not normal, it was frothy and had strange dark pieces in it, sorry for the gory details, I am just sharing what happened. That night I went to sleep and asked the spirits to visit me in my dreams. That night I got a vision from the Hibiscus plant, something I had not heard of at the time and something I still drink in tea to this day.
The next day I spoke to my girlfriend (now my ex) and said something along the lines of “I don’t know exactly what is happening, but I am experiencing something out of this world” and told her I was going to contact the Shaman (Rebekah) from the documentary I had watched. That evening I was also sharing the experience with my brother, and mentioned contacting Rebekah when I finished speaking with him. It was when I got off the phone, and went to send her a message that I realized she had just sent me a message.
It felt like something from a film- as we had never had any communication before hand, and 6 months after watching her documentary, in just the moment I was going to start typing a message to her- she ended up contacting me.
We started to speak, I explained the whole situation and it was not long after this that I started to communicate with Ayahuasca through a series of dreams, meditations and visions. Now it is easy to think of visions as grand images and clear messages, but speaking for myself, communication is often non verbal and non visionary- it is more of a knowing.
Ayahuasca showed up in many forms and she has a strong fierce presence, almost like a mother lion and you are the cub, you know you are safe, but at the same time you know she will take no shit. I started a dialog with her, asked for permission to drink and waited (a little impatiently) for the opportunity to arise.
It would be October of 2016, 2 years after all of this started that I would get that opportunity. On 2 weeks notice Rebekah had someone drop out of one of her ceremonies, and I jumped at the chance to take the space. After loaning some money to go, I took the leap of faith and was ready for my jungle adventure.
The experience was everything I had hoped for plus a hell of a lot more, I went with the intention to find my life purpose and I found it. I became 1000 times more productive and I came out feeling ready to take on the world.
But for now I wanted to discuss the journey that unfolded after. When I left the jungle I spent 2 months feeling invincible. I literally felt like I could achieve anything, and with good reason. When I was in the jungle I had strong visions of uniting media and creating a platform in which we could organize issues that need to be addressed, and one of the first conversations I had upon leaving the jungle was with someone who was working on this. After a few weeks of offering my support and enthusiasm to the project they made me co-founder and I was working on what I had envisioned- with the ability to reach hundreds of millions of people. It was absolutely perfect.
The problem was I was working all day every day, without any direction or a clear plan of how exactly all of these ideas would be achieved. I just expected I would be guided all the way to the perfect outcome. I actually forgot I was human. After 2 months working 15 hour days on multiple projects I was completely exhausted. It would take me from the start of January until mid March (the start of spring) for me to fully recover.
The experience was a roller coaster- however after all the dust had settled- I would say I am grateful for all the lessons, and I grew a lot from the experience. A lot of what I envisioned happening (and there was a lot) is starting to happen, just a little slower than I first expected.
I still feel the spirit of Ayahuasca inside of me, my body has changed physically- I have become stronger (mentally, spiritually and physically), if I ever feel sick it goes away very quickly. I am became open to new experiences, have met some incredible people of late and am more of myself, and accepting of that which I am not. Life is still a work in progress and I am okay with that, but there is far more direction than ever before.
6 months later from the experience I am again very productive, flowing creatively and a few days ago I arrived back to the jungle town of Iquitos in Peru, this time to volunteer in the retreat centre where it all started. Who knows where the journey will go next, but I will keep you all updated of the good, the bad and everything in between.
You can take a look at the retreat center where I will be over the next few months HERE and feel free to shoot me an email with the subject line Ayahuasca if you wish to ask me anything firstname.lastname@example.org